Where's a cat when I need one?

My roommates own 9 rats. 

Work it Out

My roommate leaves notes telling me not to touch the thermostat when I'm cold. She says if I exercised as much as her, then I'd be hot all the time too. 

She Works Hard for the Money

My roommate would leave the lights on all the time and I never said anything about it. But the one time I left lights on myself, she texted me to say "I work hard for my money. Please don't leave lights on."

Reduce Reuse Recycle

When I first moved in to my new place, I would put my recycling next to the trash can, like my family used to do at home. My roommate would bring it into my room while I was away and put the recycling on my bed. 

And You Are?

I once woke up in the middle of the night to a strange man in my dorm room and my roommate no where to be seen. He said she let him use the room to study. I wasn't too happy.

I'm Calling Your Mom

I lived with three roommates, and we all sucked at doing the dishes. Supposedly, it was my turn, so one of the roommates texted me about how I needed to do them right that minute. Well, I was in class, so it needed to wait. She started talking about how immature I was and irresponsible. I laughed it off, because she was the same as me, and told her it would get done when I got to it. She didn't like that, and somehow got my mom's cell phone number. She actually called my mom and has my mom to tell me to do the dishes. My awesome, sweet, polite mother called me, and said she didn't like the way that young woman spoke to her, but maybe I should just do the dishes and from then on, keep my stuff separate. That was the last time I did anyone else's dishes for them.